Akon featuring Akon with a little help from his friend Akon

In embarrassing news from the music community, Akon's record label admitted today that he inadvertently did a guest vocal on his own new single. Said spokesman Dexter House:

Timbaland was up on the mixing board, but apparently he turned away for just a couple of minutes to record a new opening to the remix version of Madonna's "4 Minutes" ("I'm outta time and all I got is 8 minutes, got is 8 minutes, hey"). At just that moment, Akon was shuttled into yet another recording studio, he does about 12 a night, handed a music sheet, and told to get to it. By the time Timbaland turned around, Akon was gone. Nobody knew that he had done a track on his own song.

It is unknown how this mishap might affect sales, but industry insiders surmise that it might start a trend of performers actually working on their own records. Others pooh-pooh that idea, claiming that the guest appearance is a vital part of the industry: "We can't have Young Jeezy just wandering the streets, not when there are guest raps to do."

[OK, none of the foregoing is true, but I didn't want to wait until April 1st.]